Are You Guided by Your Personal Compass?

Posted on April 12, 2012

Well, here we are! Another spring with the promise of a glorious summer ahead.  Each year we come out of hibernation to be inspired by the weather – the blooming of trees, new flowers and warm evening breezes.  As we awaken from our winter slumber and emerge from our trust down jackets, I want to bring your attention to a different type of hibernation many of us are not even aware we are in, and therefore, may never rise from.

I am talking about our spiritual hibernation.   Before I continue, please let me say, I believe every person has a different spiritual leaning.  Every person has a different name for it.  So, accordingly, I am speaking of the spiritual source you identify with. The source you lean on, turn to, love, and think about in wonder, be it everyday or maybe once or twice in your life.

I also do not think that being religious in any form shows that you are not in spiritual hibernation. In fact, I think many people use their religious identity and devotion as an external badge and still be completely void of a spiritual connection. They will read, but not internalize. They will pray, but not feel. Lastly, and most importantly, they will ask for something in prayer or meditation and promise unconditional acceptance but secretly fear an outcome that they do not want.

So let me put plainly what I mean:  spiritual hibernation is when you are asleep at the wheel spiritually.

You are busy, very busy, doing things – running errands, making plans or complaining of not having any, taking care of everyone, feeling great at your accomplishments, criticizing yourself for your failures and working very hard at being the best you can be in all aspects.  But somehow you do not have the time, energy or opportunity to facilitate a connection with your spiritual source. You are awake, but somehow asleep at the same time.  It’s an odd existence we all experience at different points of our life.

The reason why I wanted to write about spiritual hibernation (SH) is because I was in one, and  each spring season, I am again revitalized and reawakened.  I  had no idea  was in a SH. You see, I was very happy with my life, devout to my spiritual source, and completely content as I pushed myself to excel beyond even my own  expectations.  I was dedicated to my family and loved my work.   I believed I had it all.

Then, something happened.

The best way I can describe it is as a gradual shift of my personal compass. And It all started with the birth of my daughter, almost three years ago.  It was then, I came to realize the miracle of a spiritual source that I could not comprehend. The joy, the love – it was overwhelming.  For those of you mothers out there, I’m sure you can relate to the feeling.

Soon, my leanings and interests slowly started to change. I started to appreciate nature at a deeper level.  I craved silence even more than I did before.   Even as someone who always loved their alone time, now I was looking for those quiet moments to think and feel more .  Deep insightful conversations excited me. I started becoming more impressed with deep thinkers than orators or even over-achieving doers. I started becoming more attracted to quiet contributors than center-stage personalities in all capacities, personally or professionally.  

But most importantly, I started to really slow down.

I became even better at being present. Wherever I was, I was there in my entirety.  I became much better at enjoying the moment I was in – no matter how small.  Even professionally, I had more inspiration, more joy.  And because I slowed down, I was able to use precision in my work – making me much more productive. I was accomplishing more, but felt more balanced than ever. I started dealing with clients who gave me a deeper sense of fulfillment.  Different interests started opening different doors for me. Not doors to what society would generally view as powerful places or people, but to places and people that were truly authentic. All this made my experiences extremely satisfying.

My personal and professional relationships started to change as I became more aware of everyone around me at a deeper level. I had always thought of myself as someone who could read people, that’s why I chose legal mediation as a career, but now I felt like I truly understand people.  I felt their energy, whether positive or negative, around me.  I learned and felt a level of empathy for those around me that did not exist for me until now. I could actually see and feel who was and was not in tune with their personal compass, despite what they displayed externally.  This insight provided me both with appreciation and disappointment, as I understood what these relationships really meant, whether they aided my spiritual awakening or took me away from it. 

All around me was an infinite amount of joy and energy. Everything and everyone offered inspiration.  I had woken up. 

Over the past three years, I have woken up to what I really want, love, and need.  I had woken up to accept The Big Plan and take all of the pain, challenges and joy it brings.   And I continue to wake up.  

I honestly thought that as I did pro bono work or advocated for social justice, I was following a noble personal compass.  I considered myself the good guy.  But until I woke up form my SH, I didn’t realize how much better of a person I could be, and how much more I still have to go.  It let me see that my past “happiness” was a life that needed major tweaking.  My good intentions were also accompanied by my ego, looking to challenges and accomplishments to feel victorious.  I led a results driven life that would get me down if I didn’t achieve what I thought to be a perfect solution.

I realize now there was a greater force carrying me through the whole time.  Something bigger than me that was providing me with this ambition and passion.  No matter how much I knew this intellectually, it did not become real until I internalized it.

So, now it’s your turn – what compass is guiding you as a new spring season is upon us?  Is it your love, pain, joy, fear, ambition, insecurity, greed, ego or something else entirely?   Spring doesn’t happen overnight, and neither does waking up from SH.  So, take your time, let it sink in, and then find what guides you.